The saying “it takes a village to raise a child” couldn’t have felt more distant when my husband and I welcomed our baby during the height of the COVID-19 pandemic. Not only were we navigating first-time parenthood, but we were also doing it in Korea, thousands of miles from family, with a language barrier that made everything feel even more isolating.
The Birth of Our Daughter in a Foreign Land
Giving birth is an intense experience in any situation, but doing so in a country where you don’t speak the language fluently adds another layer of complexity. During those early months, the isolation we felt wasn’t just physical due to the pandemic restrictions but also emotional. We couldn’t rely on family and friends to visit or help. While in Korea, even though the healthcare system was exceptional, communicating our needs and understanding their responses often felt overwhelming.
We had a part-time confinement nanny who visited on weekdays from 9 AM to 6 PM, but once she left, it was just the two of us, trying to figure out the rest on our own. There was no village to turn to, no grandparents or relatives to pop by and offer support. The language barrier also made it difficult to lean on local resources that might have been available to new parents.
Navigating the Early Days of Parenthood Alone
The pandemic meant that many of the usual postpartum services were limited or unavailable. Lactation consultants, mommy groups, and postnatal check-ups all shifted online, which wasn’t the same as having someone physically there to guide you. Even things like grocery shopping became a logistical challenge, especially with strict quarantine measures in place. We were in survival mode, figuring out everything—from breastfeeding to baby sleep schedules—alone.
The hardest part was not being able to share those first precious moments with our family. No one could come and visit. Our baby’s grandparents met her for the first time through a screen, and it was heart-wrenching to know that those first cuddles and kisses would have to wait. We were also managing the exhaustion of new parenthood without the support that we had once taken for granted, like a home-cooked meal dropped off or a quick errand run by a friend.
The Struggles of Isolation
Isolation during the pandemic was hard for everyone, but for new parents, it felt especially cruel. The pressure to keep things together was immense, and there was little opportunity for a break. Our only respite was the brief daytime help from the nanny and the occasional video call with family back home. However, time zone differences and the emotional distance of a screen couldn't compare to the presence of loved ones physically helping you.
The cultural differences in parenting approaches also became a factor. In Korea, certain practices around postpartum recovery and baby care are different from what we might have experienced back home. Navigating these differences on top of the pandemic restrictions made the situation more daunting.
Finding Strength in Each Other
Despite the immense challenges, one thing became clear: we had to rely on each other more than ever. Without the "village" of family and friends to help us, my husband and I became each other's village. We learned to tag-team through sleepless nights, shared the burden of housework, and celebrated small victories like getting our daughter to sleep through the night or managing a full grocery run without any hiccups.
It wasn’t easy, but we adapted. We found comfort in creating our own routines and leaned into the limited resources available to us. Virtual support groups became lifelines, and connecting with other parents online offered a sense of solidarity, even though it wasn’t the same as face-to-face interaction.
The Lessons We Learned
Parenting in isolation during COVID-19 taught us lessons we never expected to learn. We became more resilient, more adaptable, and more resourceful than we ever thought possible. We also learned that, while having a village is important, there’s also a strength that comes from weathering storms together as a family. The experience gave us a deep sense of appreciation for each other and a newfound confidence in our ability to handle challenges.
While we eagerly await the day our daughter can meet her grandparents in person, we now know that we are capable of much more than we imagined. The pandemic may have taken away our village and our visitors, but it gave us a powerful reminder of the strength we carry within ourselves.
Parenting in isolation was difficult, but it shaped us in ways that will stay with us forever. As restrictions ease and life slowly returns to a new normal, we look forward to sharing our journey with our family and friends, knowing that we’ve already overcome so much.
And with that, we could overcome almost anything!
Till next week, parents!